I'm sitting in the bus.
On the way to collect a Panasonic voucher.
I start crying.
I think about how meaningless my life feels.
What am I living day by day doing?
What is my life worth in this world?
What am I doing to contribute to God's Kingdom?

I find no joy in my work life.
It drains the life out of me.
I love my husband.
I also think of how I add value to his life.
Am I doing anything to be of importance to him?
Am I being a "helper"?
I honestly don't know.
I sometimes feel that I am more of a burden to him.

I feel lonely.
I don't know how to express how I feel.

The last time I felt like I did something fulfilling was my time in HaNoi.
I guess this is how Adrian feels.

But I will be strong.
I need to be strong.
For my family, for my husband, for myself.
I don't want to show my unhappiness & end up being a burden to him.

I will be the best "helper".
I will wise up.

God, I need Your strength & Your encouragement to show me the light.
Amen.